A WRITER'S GUIDE TO MURDER
TRIGGER-WARNING: Vivid descriptions of death and dead bodies.
Drowning scenes can be some of the most intense and gripping moments in storytelling. Whether you’re writing a high-stakes thriller, a tense drama, or a tragic romance, getting the details right can make your scenes feel more authentic and impactful. But how do you capture the true essence of drowning without resorting to clichés or exaggerations? Understanding the workings of a drowning can turn a standard scene into something truly memorable. By exploring the real-life details and nuances of this dramatic situation, you’ll be able to write scenes that are both gripping and believable. So, let’s get started and make your drowning scenes as powerful and realistic as they can be.
This guide is here to help you navigate the murky waters of writing about drowning. We’ll dive (pun intended) into how different scenarios—like freshwater, saltwater, or even molasses—affect the body and how these effects can drive the drama in your story. From the grim changes in a body after drowning to the way toxic environments complicate a rescue, we’ll cover it all.
How does it look?
One thing that is almost a golden rule in writing is show, don't tell. When a body drowns, its appearance undergoes a series of profound and unsettling changes. The transformation begins as soon as the person is submerged, and the process can continue for days, depending on various factors such as the water’s temperature, the body’s condition, and the environment in which the drowning occurred.
Initially, the skin of a drowned body may appear pale or bluish, a result of hypoxia, which is a lack of oxygen. This discoloration is particularly noticeable in the extremities, such as the fingers and toes. As the body remains submerged, the skin starts to exhibit a condition known as maceration. This occurs when the outer layer of the skin absorbs water, causing it to become wrinkled and soft. The effect can make the skin look pruney, similar to how fingers and toes appear after prolonged exposure to water. This wrinkling is more pronounced in freshwater drownings due to the osmotic properties of water compared to saltwater.
Over time, the skin on the body, especially on areas such as the hands, feet, and lower limbs, begins to peel. This skin peeling is due to the breakdown of the outer layer of skin, which becomes saturated and weak. The skin may slough off in patches, revealing a raw, pinkish layer beneath. This peeling can be particularly graphic and unsettling, as it exposes the underlying tissues and creates a contrast between the peeled and intact skin.
In addition to maceration and peeling, a drowned body can exhibit other telltale signs of submersion. Rigor mortis, or the post-mortem stiffening of the muscles, begins to set in shortly after death. This stiffening can make the body appear rigid and unyielding. Over time, rigor mortis will pass, and the body may become limp again, contributing to its bloated appearance. Bloating is another significant change. As decomposition progresses, bacteria in the body produce gases that accumulate in the abdominal cavity, causing the body to swell. This bloating can make the body appear unnaturally inflated, with a distended abdomen and swollen limbs. The bloated body may also exhibit putrefaction, where the skin takes on a greenish or blackish hue due to the breakdown of red blood cells and the release of gases and fluids.
In saltwater drownings, the effects of the water can be more pronounced. The salt in the water can draw moisture out of the body, exacerbating dehydration and making the skin appear more shriveled and taut. Conversely, in freshwater drownings, the body may become more waterlogged, leading to further swelling and an increased tendency for the skin to peel and macerate.
The eyes of a drowned body can also tell a story of the drowning process. They may be open, with a vacant, glassy appearance. In some cases, the eyes can be bloodshot or show signs of conjunctival hemorrhage, where the tiny blood vessels in the eyes have burst. This can contribute to the eerie, lifeless look of the corpse.
Types of liquids to drown in
The type of liquid in which you'll drown your victim matters too, more than you may think. There are different effects and drama levels with each type, which can help you pick the right one for your story. Some are very subtle (at least, when you look at the surface) and some are violent, painful and very frightening. I've listed some liquids that range from more common to very uncommon but interesting.
FRESHWATER DROWING
Facts and Details:
Laryngospasm: The initial involuntary contraction of the vocal cords, commonly referred to as "dry drowning," acts as a natural defense mechanism. This reflex temporarily prevents water from entering the lungs, giving the drowning victim a brief moment of hope. However, it also means that their struggle is often silent and unseen, adding an eerie element to the drowning process.
Electrolyte Imbalance: When freshwater floods the lungs, it rapidly enters the bloodstream through the alveoli. Unlike saltwater, which can draw fluids out of the bloodstream, freshwater dilutes the blood electrolytes. This sudden imbalance can severely disrupt heart function, leading to cardiac arrhythmias or even arrest. The body’s desperate attempts to restore balance are ultimately futile without immediate intervention.
Time Frame: The window for survival in freshwater drowning is alarmingly short. Hypoxia, the critical lack of oxygen, can render a person unconscious in just 2-3 minutes. Without rescue, brain damage and death can follow swiftly, within 4-6 minutes. This rapid timeline underscores the urgency in rescue situations and the tragic brevity of the struggle for air.
Useful for Writers:
Silent Struggle: Freshwater drowning often unfolds quietly, making it a powerful choice for scenes where a character's distress goes unnoticed. The lack of dramatic splashing and shouting can create a hauntingly calm surface, beneath which a deadly battle is fought. This can add a layer of dramatic irony, as onlookers might be oblivious to the victim's peril.
Rapid Onset: The swift progression from initial struggle to unconsciousness injects a palpable sense of urgency and tension into your narrative. This can heighten the stakes in scenes where time is of the essence, whether it's a suspenseful race against the clock to save a loved one or a tragic moment of realization too late. The rapid onset of unconsciousness and death in freshwater drowning can be used to convey the cruel and unforgiving nature of water.
SALTWATER DROWNING
Facts and Details:
Pulmonary Edema: When saltwater is inhaled, its high salt concentration draws fluid from the bloodstream into the lungs, a process known as pulmonary edema. This results in swelling and fluid buildup in the lung tissue. The lungs become heavy and congested, making breathing increasingly difficult and inefficient. Each breath becomes a laborious effort as the fluid impairs gas exchange and fills the lungs with a sludgy mixture.
Irritation: Saltwater is particularly harsh on lung tissue. Its saline content irritates and inflames the respiratory passages, which can lead to internal bleeding and further exacerbate breathing difficulties. This irritation adds a layer of suffering to the drowning process, as the victim endures intense discomfort and severe respiratory distress.
Time Frame: In the scenario of saltwater drowning, unconsciousness can occur within 1-3 minutes due to rapid onset of hypoxia (lack of oxygen). The timeline to death is typically 4-8 minutes, influenced by both oxygen deprivation and the severe lung complications caused by the saltwater. This extended window compared to freshwater drowning provides a critical, albeit brief, opportunity for rescue.
Fun Facts:
Marine Influence: Saltwater's effect on the lungs isn't just a modern discovery; sailors and explorers have long observed its detrimental impact on health. Historical accounts often mention “saltwater fever,” reflecting the long-standing recognition of the harmful effects of prolonged exposure to seawater.
Ocean Currents: Saltwater drowning often involves the unpredictable nature of ocean currents. These currents can create treacherous conditions, dragging victims further from safety and complicating rescue efforts. Oceanographers study these currents to better understand their impact on marine navigation and safety.
Marine Life: The presence of marine life can add an additional layer of danger to saltwater drowning. While jellyfish and other sea creatures might not directly cause harm, their presence can exacerbate the victim's panic and complicate rescue efforts. Some species, like the box jellyfish, are venomous and can cause severe pain, further intensifying the victim’s ordeal.
Useful for Writers:
Visible Distress: Saltwater drowning often manifests with dramatic, visible signs of distress. The irritation and fluid buildup can cause the victim to cough violently, sputter, and choke, providing a stark and emotional depiction of their struggle. These vivid symptoms can make the scene more intense and emotionally charged for the reader.
Environmental Factors: The ocean environment introduces numerous complications to the drowning scenario. Strong currents, powerful waves, and unpredictable tides can all pose significant obstacles to rescue efforts. The remote and often inhospitable nature of ocean settings can amplify the victim’s sense of isolation and helplessness. Additionally, the potential presence of marine predators adds an element of unpredictability and danger, heightening the tension and stakes of the scene.
WINE
Facts and Details:
Alcohol Intoxication: Rapid ingestion of wine can lead to rapid intoxication, impairing the victim's motor skills, judgment, and consciousness. The high alcohol content affects the central nervous system, leading to decreased coordination and awareness. As the victim becomes increasingly disoriented, they are less able to respond effectively or escape from danger, making them more vulnerable to drowning.
Chemical Pneumonitis: Inhaling wine introduces its alcohol and other compounds into the lungs, which can lead to inflammation similar to chemical pneumonitis. This condition causes severe irritation and swelling of the lung tissue, worsening the respiratory distress and complicating the drowning process. The victim may experience intense coughing, a burning sensation in the chest, and difficulty breathing, which exacerbates their struggle.
Time Frame: The effects of alcohol combined with hypoxia (lack of oxygen) mean that unconsciousness can occur within just 1-2 minutes of submersion. The victim's deteriorating ability to breathe and the impact of alcohol poisoning can lead to death in 3-5 minutes if not rescued. The combination of these factors makes the window for intervention extremely narrow.
Fun Facts:
Historical Oddity: While wine drowning is rare, alcohol poisoning has historical precedent. In Ancient Rome, there are accounts of excessive drinking leading to fatal accidents, though not specifically drowning.
Chemistry of Wine: Wine contains ethanol, which affects the brain and body. When inhaled, ethanol can cause additional irritation and inflammation in the respiratory tract. The unique interaction of alcohol with the body’s chemistry when aspirated contributes to the complexity of this scenario.
Popular Culture: The concept of drowning in wine has appeared in literature and mythology as an exaggerated, dramatic death. For example, in Shakespeare's "The Merry Wives of Windsor," Falstaff nearly meets a sticky end in a vat of wine, although it’s played for comedic effect.
Useful for Writers:
Dual Danger: Wine drowning presents a dual threat of alcohol poisoning and physical obstruction. This scenario adds layers of complexity to the victim's plight, combining the effects of rapid intoxication with the immediate dangers of drowning. The interplay between these factors creates a compelling and multifaceted death scene.
Sensory Details: The sensory experience of drowning in wine can be intensely vivid. Describing the distinct taste of wine, the aromatic bouquet of different varieties, and the burning sensation as it fills the lungs can heighten the realism of the scene. Detailed descriptions of the sensory overload—such as the sharp, acrid smell of alcohol and the viscous, cloying texture of the wine—can immerse readers in the victim's experience and intensify the emotional impact of the scene.
QUICKSAND
Facts and Details:
Viscosity: Quicksand's thick, semi-fluid consistency behaves like a trap. It’s a mixture of sand, water, and clay, which gives it a gel-like quality. When a person steps into quicksand and begins to move, they displace the sand and water, creating more friction and causing them to sink further. The more they struggle, the deeper they sink, as the quicksand essentially tightens around their limbs.
Asphyxiation: Submersion in quicksand leads to asphyxiation if the victim’s airway becomes obstructed. The thick mixture can cover the face and block the nose and mouth, preventing the intake of oxygen. As the victim sinks, the quicksand's pressure increases, making breathing increasingly difficult.
Time Frame: In quicksand, struggling can last for several minutes. Unconsciousness typically occurs within 2-3 minutes of full submersion due to the lack of oxygen. Death usually follows shortly after, as the victim remains trapped and unable to escape.
Fun Facts:
Quicksand Misconceptions: Contrary to popular belief, quicksand doesn’t pull people under with a sudden, violent force. Instead, it’s a slow and insidious process. Movies often exaggerate its dangers for dramatic effect.
Natural Occurrences: Quicksand can form in various environments, including riverbanks, marshes, and beaches. The key ingredients are loose sand or silt, a water source, and a lack of solid ground beneath.
Historical Myths: In ancient times, quicksand was often featured in myths and legends, depicted as a malevolent force. It was believed to be a trap set by gods or spirits to ensnare unwary travelers.
Useful for Writers:
Gradual Descent: The slow, relentless sinking in quicksand provides a powerful narrative tool. It allows for an extended, tension-filled scene where the victim’s struggle becomes increasingly desperate. This gradual descent can be a metaphor for the character's inner turmoil or a way to heighten the suspense and stakes.
Environmental Interaction: The setting in which quicksand is found can greatly influence the scene's tone. In a remote jungle, the thick, suffocating atmosphere and exotic flora can heighten the sense of isolation and danger. In a desolate desert, the harsh, unforgiving landscape can emphasize the victim's vulnerability and the lack of potential rescue. The environment can also introduce additional challenges, such as venomous creatures or extreme weather conditions, amplifying the peril and isolation of the quicksand trap.
OIL
Facts and Details:
Viscosity: Oil’s thick, viscous nature significantly impedes movement. Unlike water, which allows for relative ease of swimming and escape, oil creates a dense, sludgy environment. This thickness makes it extremely difficult for a person to swim or maneuver, causing them to sink slowly and become trapped in the oily substance.
Chemical Pneumonitis: Inhaling oil introduces harmful hydrocarbons into the lungs, leading to severe lung damage and chemical pneumonitis. This condition causes inflammation, swelling, and potential bleeding within the lungs. The victim experiences intense respiratory distress, exacerbated by the oil’s thick, greasy texture which further impairs the ability to breathe.
Time Frame: Due to the combined effects of asphyxiation and severe lung damage from inhalation, unconsciousness can occur within 1-2 minutes. Death typically follows within 3-5 minutes, driven by the inability to breathe and the extensive lung damage caused by the oil.
Fun Facts:
Historical Reference: The concept of drowning in oil, while less common, has historical roots. In ancient times, oil pits were used for various purposes, and there are accounts of tragic accidents involving oil. The thick, sticky nature of oil made rescue and recovery extremely challenging.
Industrial Hazards: Oil spills and leaks in industrial settings are a significant safety concern. They create hazardous conditions not just for drowning but also for slips, fires, and toxic exposure. Oil spills have been notorious for their environmental and human safety impacts.
Oil and History: In Roman times, oil was used in various rituals and was a symbol of wealth and luxury. The thick, sticky nature of oil has been used metaphorically in literature and historical texts to represent corruption and moral decay.
Useful for Writers:
Industrial Setting: Oil drowning is often associated with industrial or mechanical environments. The setting can enhance the scene's gritty, hazardous nature, adding layers of danger and complexity. Factories, refineries, or oil rigs can provide a foreboding backdrop that heightens the tension and peril of the situation.
Sensory Overload: The thick, greasy texture of oil, combined with its suffocating, acrid smell, creates a claustrophobic and intense scene. Describing the slick, heavy feel of the oil, the struggle to breathe through the viscous substance, and the overpowering stench can immerse readers in the harrowing experience. This sensory overload adds depth to the scene, making it more vivid and emotionally impactful.
MOLASSES
Facts and Details:
High Viscosity: Molasses is extremely dense and sticky, giving it a syrupy consistency that makes movement nearly impossible. Its high viscosity means that once a person becomes submerged, every attempt to struggle or swim only exacerbates the problem, as the molasses adheres to the body and resists movement.
Airway Obstruction: Due to its thick, sticky nature, molasses can completely block the airway. If a person inhaled or was submerged in molasses, it could quickly obstruct the throat and lungs, leading to rapid and severe asphyxiation. The molasses’ stickiness makes it difficult to clear the airway, compounding the victim’s struggle to breathe.
Time Frame: Unconsciousness from molasses drowning can occur within 1-2 minutes due to asphyxiation. Death typically follows in 3-4 minutes as the victim is unable to breathe and the molasses continues to block the airway and impair respiratory function.
Fun Facts:
Historical Incidents: The most notorious molasses-related disaster occurred in 1919 in Boston, where a massive molasses tank burst, releasing a wave of molasses that flooded the streets, causing significant property damage and loss of life. This event highlighted the dangerous, yet often overlooked, nature of molasses.
Historical Use: Molasses was a common ingredient in many historical recipes and was often used in ship cargo, making it a staple in trade and cooking from colonial times through the early 20th century. Its use in historical contexts can add depth to the setting.
Chemical Composition: Molasses is a byproduct of sugar refining and contains various sugars, minerals, and organic compounds. This sticky substance’s chemical properties contribute to its high viscosity and the severe difficulty it poses when inhaled or ingested.
Useful for Writers:
Historical Context: Molasses drowning often evokes a historical or rustic setting, which can add a unique twist to your scene. The association with older industrial processes or early 20th-century disasters can provide a rich backdrop and enhance the historical or atmospheric depth of the story.
Sensory Detail: The sweet, sticky nature of molasses contrasts sharply with its deadly potential. Describing the molasses’ thick, treacly texture and its cloying, syrupy scent can provide vivid sensory details. The contrast between the molasses' seemingly innocuous sweetness and its lethal properties can create a striking and unsettling effect in your narrative.
SEWAGE
Facts and Details:
Toxic Gases: Sewage systems are breeding grounds for dangerous gases like methane and hydrogen sulfide. Methane is highly flammable and can displace oxygen, while hydrogen sulfide is poisonous and has a strong, rotten egg odor. Inhaling these gases can lead to immediate unconsciousness within seconds to 1 minute. The victim may lose consciousness so quickly that they may not even have a chance to react or escape.
Pathogens: Sewage contains a wide array of harmful bacteria, viruses, and other pathogens. These microorganisms can cause severe infections if inhaled or ingested. Exposure to such contaminated water can lead to rapid onset of illness and further complicate the victim's situation, increasing the risk of severe health complications.
Time Frame: Due to the immediate effects of toxic gases, unconsciousness can occur almost instantaneously or within seconds to 1 minute. Once unconscious, the victim faces drowning and toxic exposure, leading to death typically within 3-5 minutes. This brief timeframe highlights the severity and urgency of the situation.
Fun Facts:
Historical Context: Historically, sewer systems have been associated with diseases and public health crises. The understanding of sewage-related health risks was a major factor in the development of modern sanitation systems in the 19th and 20th centuries, driven by efforts to prevent outbreaks of cholera and other waterborne diseases.
Sewage System Design: Many cities have complex sewage systems designed to handle large volumes of waste and reduce the risk of contamination. The engineering behind these systems includes ventilation to prevent gas buildup and treatment facilities to process and sanitize waste, illustrating the significant infrastructure dedicated to managing this hazardous environment.
Pop Culture: Sewage and septic tanks have often been used in horror and thriller genres to evoke feelings of disgust and claustrophobia. Films, books, and TV shows frequently use these settings to heighten the sense of danger and desperation, making them effective backdrops for dramatic and tense scenes.
Useful for Writers:
Immediate Danger: The sudden onset of unconsciousness due to toxic gases provides an opportunity for a dramatic twist in the narrative. The rapid and unexpected nature of the victim's collapse can create intense suspense and heighten the urgency of the rescue or survival situation.
Grim Environment: The setting of sewage—whether it's in dark, filthy sewers, or claustrophobic septic tanks—adds a layer of horror and desperation to the scene. Describing the filthy, pungent surroundings and the oppressive atmosphere can enhance the grimness of the situation. The claustrophobic environment contributes to a sense of entrapment and dread, making the victim’s plight more harrowing.
How to save someone after they've been underwater for a while
If you end up feeling guilty for trying to drown your character, here is how to get them back to life. When rescuing someone who has been underwater for several minutes, immediate action is crucial. First, ensure the scene is safe before approaching the victim. If you’re trained in CPR and have access to emergency services, call for help while starting the rescue.
Carefully remove the person from the water, supporting their head and neck to avoid potential spinal injuries. Once on land, check their responsiveness. If they are unresponsive and not breathing, begin CPR immediately. Start with chest compressions: place your hands on the center of their chest and compress deeply at a rate of 100-120 compressions per minute. After 30 compressions, give 2 rescue breaths by tilting their head back, sealing your lips around theirs, and breathing into their mouth. Continue CPR until emergency personnel arrive or the person starts breathing on their own. Avoid forceful movements or tilting the head excessively, as this can complicate the situation. Once breathing resumes, place the person in the recovery position to keep their airway open and monitor their breathing and pulse until help arrives. It’s vital to seek medical attention even if they appear to recover, as complications can arise from prolonged submersion.
Do people spurt out water like in the movies?
In reality, the dramatic depiction of a person spurting out a significant amount of water after starting to breathe, as often shown in movies, is less common. Here’s why:
Lung Capacity and Water Intake: When a person drowns, the amount of water inhaled into the lungs varies. In many cases, only a small amount of water might enter the lungs before the person becomes unconscious. The body’s reflexes often prevent a large intake of water.
Pulmonary Edema and Absorption: Water that enters the lungs during drowning can cause pulmonary edema (fluid buildup), but it doesn’t always mean the person will expel a large volume of water when they begin to breathe again. The body absorbs or processes this fluid over time rather than expelling it immediately.
Immediate Rescue: If the person is rescued and begins breathing again promptly, they might cough or gasp, but it’s not typical for them to “spurt out” water. Coughing can occur as the body attempts to clear the airway, but this is usually a more subdued process compared to cinematic portrayals.
Medical Treatment: If a person has been underwater for a significant time, they should receive medical attention. The focus will be on stabilizing their condition, monitoring for complications such as fluid in the lungs, and managing any potential respiratory issues.
Jake Zuurbier, born in 2002, is a writer with a broad background. With a degree in both Business and Management, his work in writing is combined with a business in books & home decor, sports clothing & gear and multiple forms of other output like music or meditations. He has worked jobs in retail and horeca, ranging from working kitchen in a hotel-restaurant to a floor manager position in a clothing store.
In his free time, he is just as occupied. Photography, weight lifting, kickboxing, cooking and reading are amongst his hobbies.
To learn more, or get in contact, visit www.apolloimperium.com/jakezuurbier
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